Ralph Macchio On Parenthood: "It's The Toughest Job In The World"

Ralph Macchio, who plays Archie Rodriguez on Ugly Betty, talked to OK! about his favorite role: fatherhood. The 48-year-old Karate Kid star and his wife of 22 years, Phyllis, are parents to two teenagers: Julia, 17, and Daniel, 14. Ralph had some sound advice for the new moms on the show, Rebecca Romijn and Ana Ortiz.

One thing I told Ana is to be flexible. It’s the toughest job in the world. Surround your kids with as much love as possible, create the environment for communication and conversation and be flexible. Also, be flexible when they’re babies, and you have to sometimes be the strong arm with the tough love as they get older. The rule book? I’m still looking for it.”

He also advised them to expect surreal reactions to fame.

They’ll look back and, if a movie’s on television, they’ll remind me of how much better I looked back then,” he laughs. “One of my favorite moments was when my son found a whole bunch of newspaper clippings and magazines when he was 7, and didn’t know I was in the business. He came up, and was like ‘oh my God, dad was huge, and we missed it!’ He really enjoyed the Ugly Betty run because he was the one who went with me when I auditioned for that, and I’m on for a second season now. He’s like ‘see? You should bring me along more often.’”

Ralph went on to say that Julia is gearing up for college, majoring in dance, with an eye on performing arts and psychology. While his son Daniel has the passion to be a pilot.

“I’m trying to persuade him to do that on the side, but he’s 14 and he wants to be a pilot hands down,” Ralph says. “He took his first flight lesson for his birthday. That’s a gift we got him. I was just praying until he landed. As a parent, you don’t necessarily want to tell your kids to be a pilot, but it’s his passion – at least at this point. I say ‘buy the building, own the company and have a jet on the side.’"

Ralph described how his relationships with his children have grown.

“My son and I are buddies – we really are,” he says. “He’s 14, so I’m still hanging onto that. We like going to ball games, we like taking trips together and things like that. We’re looking at colleges with my daughter now. She is very close with my wife, which I am thrilled with. Mother-daughter closeness is very good, especially launching into those years.”

And what is his greatest theory on parenthood?

“It’s roots and wings – that’s my theory. You give your kids the roots and the foundation, and you have to give your kids wings – the ability to fly. It’s tough to do that. You want to keep holding down to the roots. That’s my dilemma.”

Ralph and his daughter Julia are pictured above attending the New York premiere of Hairspray.