Grey’s Anatomy star Sarah Drew is inviting Celebrity Baby Scoop readers to follow along as she experiences her first pregnancy.
In her first guest blog, Sarah, 30, reflects on the challenges of the first trimester. The mom-to-be shares her “biggest lesson” amidst the exhaustion of early pregnancy and encourages other expectant moms not to judge yourself and to “give yourself a break.”
I just passed my 16 week mark and I’m thrilled to say that I’m finally emerging from the challenges of my first trimester.
My pregnancy has been an interesting ride so far. I was warned about the sickness, exhaustion, sore breasts, and need for sleep. What I wasn’t warned about was the sadness. Because of my nausea and fatigue, I found myself saying “no” to almost every social invitation I received. I hibernated in my house, feeling lonely and frustrated that I didn’t feel more like myself. I am an extremely social person. One of my favorite things to do is throw big parties at my house, or hang out with friends. All of those qualities left me during my first trimester. I would hang out with a few good friends and was forced to leave after an hour because I became so tired. I threw a B-B-Q for my husband and found myself crying in the bathroom about two hours in from sheer exhaustion.
The worst part was that I started to resent the little baby growing in me. Before I heard the heartbeat, this baby was kind of just an alien who had taken over my body and spirit and was changing me inside and out. That made me feel terrible and I started to question whether I had a maternal bone in my body.
The biggest lesson I learned during my first trimester was to give myself a break. I had to remind myself that these feelings were temporary, that I wasn’t changing forever into a sad hermit. I had to remember that once I felt better, I’d be able to fall in love with my baby. I had to let go of the guilt I felt for checking out of my friendships for a few weeks because my body was (and still is) working over time. Once I started to let myself feel what I felt without any judgment, I was able to relax.
And the GREAT news is, I’m feeling so much better! The nausea has gone away. I’m still tired, but not as exhausted. I just hosted a party last night and felt like myself again. Not only that, but I’ve started to fall in love with my baby. I actually had a moment on Saturday where held my belly, looked down and said “Do you know how loved you are? Do you have any idea?” and burst into tears at the prospect of getting to hold my child’s face in my hands and speak those words directly in his or her eyes.
First trimester tip: Give yourself a break. Feel what you feel. Don’t judge yourself. You won’t feel like this forever. I promise.